Fun on Purpose

On Sunday, we threw a birthday party for no one in particular.

As I was boringly cleaning out my kitchen cabinets (Ok, I lied - I love cleaning out cabinets.), I came across a bag of birthday party supplies; party hats, streamers, balloons, candles, the whole she-bang. I blew up a balloon and when I handed it to my 2-year-old daughter, she squealed with joy. There is nothing more darling than a pant-less toddler in red cowboy boots and a party hat giggling while throwing a balloon up in the air. My 5-year-old son, a huge smile on his face, walked in the room and said, "What are we doing?" Inspired, I said, "We're having a birthday party." This set off a whole chain of events, including decorating the entire house with blue streamers (they're still up, 5 days later) and balloons and the singing of "Happy Birthday" to every one of us, including the dog. My little boy, in particular, was so delighted by this entire experience that when my husband came home, he gleefully shouted, "Daddy! We're having a party!" It was a good day.

It reminded me how goddamned serious we adults are all the time. Yes, we'll agree to don silly hats and cover our homes in ribbons of paper IF the exact auspicious date is upon us. But otherwise? No way. We've got too much important shit to do. Like cleaning out cabinets.

Kids are so much smarter than we are.

There is value in stopping to be silly. The beauty of being spontaneous. The joy of connecting with my most loved people in the moment. When I take the time to make things just a tiny bit special, they notice. And they're in the exact age right now where they eat every last bit of it up. So what's wrong with me?! Why don't I lay it on thick every single day?

Ok, inner judgy-mom self, let's back it up a minute.

Partly, it's because I'm legitimately busy. And tired. I'm building my business, serving my clients, trying to find NEW clients, and trying to keep up with all the social and familial aspects of life while making sure my house isn't in shambles and dinner is on the table. Partly it's because momming is emotionally challenging sometimes. They aren't always the sunny and easygoing tiny humans we long for...of course they aren't. But upon further reflection, these aren't really good enough reasons to not be a little fun every day. It's not like it's hard.

Furthermore, I need that fun and novelty just as much as my kids do. It makes my heart sing to see the joy on their faces and to be a part of it. And when I go for long stretches of seriousness, I feel out of touch with who I am, deep-down. I start to feel like a hamster on a wheel; every day, the same shit, over and over. I want my kids to remember a childhood where there was joy and novelty and FUN. And I want to be that mama who gave that to them.

The Novelty Index

So what if I aspired incorporate silliness every day. Even if it were brief or very very simple? How might that change things? Since a failure point in this plan might be coming up with good ideas in the moment, especially since I'm a bit out of practice, a "novelty index" may be useful creation:

• Putting sprinkles in their sandwiches for lunch
• Singing happy birthday to one of the kids when it's not their birthday
• Playing in the rain
• Building a super-high tower out of household objects
• Serving whipped cream from the can as a condiment with dinner
• Dressing up like monsters and scaring Daddy when he comes home
• Inexplicably dying their water green when they aren't looking
• Waking them up with a ukulele song
• Filling the shower with water beads and letting them play for as long as they want
• Making a yarn maze throughout the house that leads to a secret surprise
• Breakfast for dinner
• Putting kind notes and pictures on our neighbors's doors
• Bringing grandparents surprise dessert to their doorstep
• Taking a trip to the humane society to see puppies and kittens
• Having my son make dinner - anything he wants
• Dance Party!
• Leaving "secret clues" all over the house to solve a mystery
• Making a movie together
• Karaoke night
• Having a family camp-out in the living room
• Learn a magic trick together

Can you help me come up with more?